


Just another day at the office

by ThePlague23



Category: Hot Fuzz (2007)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 07:57:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19741444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePlague23/pseuds/ThePlague23
Summary: It was just another day at the office. Except Nick's only wish was for all metal waste bins to be gone





	Just another day at the office

To be honest, it started like any other day. Danny was making cake, Saxton was barking, Bob was going off and yelling at the copier again, Tony was give or take a few minutes, on time, Doris was frowning and slamming down against the stapler like it killed her family, and the Andes were being twats. All was normal.

Wait

Nick looked back up at Doris, and she, the normally cheerful woman, looked terrible. Her eyes were red and puffy, her hair a mess and she hadn’t a lick of any of her usual make up on. Nick stood from his desk and went to Danny, the chief keeping a raised brow and weary eye on Doris as he walked.

“Oh, hey Nick. Choccy cake?” Danny greeted, waving a piece of cake in from of Nick almost instantly. Nick turned his weird look from Doris to Danny, watching as the He lowered the offered cake back to the kitchen counter.

“Danny, you know that no one is making make cake and ice cream anymore.” Nick reminded his partner. While he understood that it was normal for Danny to make sweet treats and confectionary food for the station while Butterman Sr. was in charge, Nick often found Danny making cakes and things just like he used to after he had been out for a drink and caused a spot of trouble.

“Yeah, I know. But I find it quite helpful actually.” Danny explained, his demeanour changing from chastised to happy within seconds. Nick always loved that about his partner, the ability to bounce, sometimes literally, after almost anything.

“How so?” Nick turned fully towards Danny, the taller man watching with an intrigued face as Danny started whisking a sort of batter in a bowl.

“Well, it helps me think, baking. Dad used to have me bake whenever I messed up or somethin’, yeah? Well, I see now that it was a way for me to have time to myself to see what I did wrong and how to avoid it. Plus, a lot of the time, us lot here forget to eat, so having leftover cake and ice cream gives us something to eat.” Danny explained as he started to pour the batter he was tending to onto the rest of the cake, covering the top with a sweet smelling white coat.

“Wow Danny. That’s, actually incredible thought out.” Nick confessed, both brows raised in a form of proud admiration for his partner. The whole NW incident had been hard on everyone, but hardest on Danny.

“Thanks Nick. I was actually thinkin’ of trying my hand at actual cooking. Like healthy stuff. You wanna come ‘round and we could give it a go?” Danny said, smoothing the topping of the cake evenly, Nick watching along with happiness for his best friend.

“Of course Danny. Sounds like fun.” Nick said happily, Danny smiling in thanks as he finished off the latest cake, pulling open the small food fridge and gently placing his creation in.

“Now, you came over for somethin’?” Danny asked, Nick’s face creasing as he quickly tried to remember why he came over.

“Oh, Yes! I wanted to ask, what’s wrong with Doris this morning?” Nick asked, prompting the pair to look over at Doris, who had moved over to the printer and was doing a quick succession action of crying, attacking and apologising to the harmless machine.

“I dunno. Maybe a guy upset her or somethin’?” Danny asked, giving his own question rather than giving any answers to Nick’s. The pair just shrugged and tilted their heads as Doris sat down and cuddled with Saxon, the poor dog looking around for his owner, who was still occupied with the copier.

“Well, I hope she’s alright.” Nick said in worry as he watched her stand back up, finally letting the dog scurry away from her, and walk back to her desk. And of course, out of nowhere, a small metal waste bin flew through the air and hit Doris in the back of the head. While she would normally shoot up and bash the Andes (it was always them who threw the waste bins), this time she just let the bin knock her head onto her desk and left it to rest. Nick saw out of the corner of his eye that Danny had picked up a cup of tea, taken a sip, and spat out all the liquid.

“She definitely is bothered.” Was all Danny said, Nick being inclined to hum and agree with the other officer. A bin proceeded to fly and hit Danny in the face, Nick turning to his friend as he heard the Andes cackling.

“Dickheads!”

“How do you two keep getting those bins! I thought I cut them out of the budget!” Nick cried as he managed to dodge another bin aimed for his head, watching as the Andes just laughed.

“You did cut the budget Boss-” One Andy started

“-But we bought a lifetime supply with our own money.” Finished the other, causing Nick to feel what he could’ve sworn was the start of a migraine. The bin that hit his own head within the next couple of seconds didn’t help.

“Y’know Chief, we could start up another swear box, but it would be for when we all do our quirks.” The Tony spoke up, Nick turning to the man and nodding at the idea.

“Yes yes that seems like a rather good idea. What should the quirks be?” Nick said in agreement, turning to all his employees, who had all turned to him. 

“Andes smoking in everyone’s faces while they know that there is a smoking area just right outside the door?” Was Tony’s answer.

“Andes baidg maddisn gies fer ejceitnr.” Bob grumbled out as he patted Saxton.

“Okay, anything that isn’t about the Andes?” Nick said, watching as everyone grew quiet in thought.

“That vein in the chief’s head going red?”

“Wait what?”

“The Andes talking at the same time?” Danny said, ignoring Nick’s confusion.

“I don’t have a vein that goes red do I?”

“Andes Throwin’ shit?” Doris said, her head finally raised from her desk. Nick just deflated and with a sigh, took a piece of cake from the small fridge and left for his office.

Yep. Another normal day. Stated with Nick wondering what had Doris feeling down, almost ended with an all out waste bin war with the Andes, and finally did end when Nick, Danny, Bob and Saxton got called out to chase after the rumoured goose that had escaped yet again. Honestly, they team had made a betting pool about how long it would take for the escape artist goose to disappear and another for how long it evades capture.

Unsurprisingly, it escaped capture, but no one had bet on catching it today anyway.


End file.
